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2 posts
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My life is falling apart

threelittlebirds started this conversation
Nov 24, 2010

Well, I've never posted before so excuse me if I do this wrong? I am 24, my fiance of 4+ years just lost his job last week. He's in landscape so besides snow (if we have any...), no one is hiring right now. He's amazing... talented and incredibly smart at what he does! Which is a lot - management, design, labor, etc.

Anyways, we've borrowed 700 to add to our "savings" to pay rent and relicense my car --- to find out I need 600+ in repairs to have a legal car!

I am 6 1/2 months pregnant and I have a 3 year old and a 9 1/2 year old full time step son. The kids don't even have enough winter clothes! We were struggling to make ends meet BEFORE he lost his job.

We have my youngest son's 3rd birthday coming up in 2 weeks, my fiance's birthday a few days later, and xmas right after that. And NOTHING to show for it.. we've never NOT had a christmas so it's terrifying.

Unemployment I hope does not get denied....!!

There's no way I can get a job that would pay rent or bills, and there's no way we could afford latchkey and daycare for both my fiance and I to work.. and he can't find anything to pay bills as well. I mean rent, electric, utilities, food, gas - which one do you decide to lose???????????????????????

On top of all this, my step son is bipolar and he's been increasingly violent. We just got him medication except his insurances disappears in 3 weeks..... just in time for his next dr appt! How can we afford to pay insurance, drs visits, meds, etc?!?! We can't afford for him not to be on medicine either... seriously.

We didn't have much but at least before we weren't completely stressed out, in tears, at each other's throats constantly.

I promise this, when we finally get back on our feet, we will always donate to charity, have savings, and adopt a family in need at Christmas.

Thank you for listening.

 

 

*Oh and I babysit for an infant and toddler Mon-Wed for $20 a day. Yeah, I go to get a job and make some money (I'm thinking 100 a week at least??) and instead I go and help out a family as needy as we are and do it cheap! I love the little girls though and have no regrets.

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Anonymous
Nov 24, 2010

I know what you are going through! It is so tough raising kids today and trying to get by.

I would suggest you try social services first - apply for wahtever services you might be eligible for - including WIC, LIHEAP, food stamps, medicaid, etc....

Also check with unemployment - they may be able to find some work for your husband - or additional training while he is unemployed. If they do deny him , make sure he files an appeal. They usually deny the first time around - so be prepared.

For christmas - check with 211.org, salvation army and toys for tots - I have all their links on my homepage.

If your stepson is diagnosed with bipolar disorder, he might be eligible for SSI. It takes a while, but it can help ensure he gets the medication and help he needs in the long run.

Finally, talk to your husband, let him know how you are feeling. Explain to him that you are not angry with him , just the situation and that you feel helpless. Let him know that you understand he is doing his best to provide for his family and that you love him no matter what. Chances are, he is feeling inadequate right now and he needs to hear from you that you do not blame him for what is happening. He needs a little reassurance to keep him going. I think it might just make everyone feel a little better.

I hope this helps... hang in there.

reply to Anonymous